i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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