in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
