if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Randomize
