I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
