I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
