so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
