So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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