And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
