im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
