I forgot how hot balto sounded
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
