Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
