he thought i was a dude.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
