note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
She bit a glass in half.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize