Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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