wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
