I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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