ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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