Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
