I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
do nipples grow back?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
