Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
