I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
