just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
