Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
