I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
should my penis look like a turkey
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
