My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
