...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I want to make a zoo with you.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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