Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
