The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
