just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i was born a porn star she said
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
