We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize