Do vagina's smell?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
