Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
My feet surprised me
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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