I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
