I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Then you guys just all showered together...?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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