You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize