Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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