Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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