it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
