how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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