Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
