But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize