I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
