Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize