It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
