Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
