Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
