just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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