direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We need to rekindle our bromance
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
