she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
