got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
